Hangover Monday: A Soap Opera Boxing Match, April 19
In a move that pissed off the entire soccer world over the weekend, the only thing I can’t get past is the name. Could they have picked a worse moniker than “Super League” to sound any more villainous? It sounds like something out of a really bad Justice League movie. Or just a really watered down version of a Space Jam team. Either way, this was the biggest thing to come out of this weekend. No one could have made a bet 12 powerhouses of futbol to say fuck it and ditch all the other kids at recess for their own kickball game.
Anyways, here is hoping you all won some money this weekend. My bookie will be getting the “Do Not Disturb” treatment for a few days. I swear to god I have a sickness for betting the bases totals. I could go 5/5 one day and then 0/10 the next but dammit I hit one good one and it brings me right back in.
Obviously, the biggest spectacle this weekend was the Jake Paul fight. I’ll be honest, I was dead wrong on this one but I am now also convinced that Ben Askren took a fall in the fight. This dude came out here looking like a pudgy crayon took two shots and hit the floor. He even put on a disorientation act when he got back up. I truly have no doubt in my mind that this one was staged. But that is boxing and the only thing I was upset about is that I guessed wrong on the Soap Opera that we all watched.
The fight really killed most bettors as Askren had more percentage of the bets and the handle going in his favor. He garnered 69 percent of the bets in this one straight up. BUT, if you were one of the 20 percent of bets that held 44 percent of the handle on outcome which was Jake Paul by TKO, you are a very happy person on this Monday morning.
The NBA had a really interesting day on Sunday with the favorites splitting with underdogs on the spread 4/8. The game that really pissed off bettors was the Nets vs Heat with the Nets not covering -3.5 after Kevin Durant went down with a hip contusion in the first quarter. Michael Rappaport can talk all his shit now because that little contusion really messed up the Lord’s Day for me.
The other two games that were backbreakers were the Mavs/Kings game and the Blazers/Hornets game. Granted, maybe the Mavs giving eight points and the Blazers giving 4.5 might have been too much in this one. But I didn’t expect Dallas to lose by 14 and Charlotte to lose by eight. Honestly, we all deserved to lose in the NBA after Kristaps Porzingis gave the all-time bitchiest shove to Mo Harkless.
Pour one Out
This isn’t a betting-related bit but we are definitely pouring one out for Alex Smith who announced his retirement today. What this dude did to come back and play in the league again was absolutely insane. We can all learn from Alex Smith. If you are down three large ones heading into Sunday, just remember that anything is possible.
Random Stat you didn’t need
We know how dominant the Michael Jordan Bulls were but I am not sure I knew just how dominant they were on the betting sheet. This weekend, I learned that MJ’s Bulls were favored in 185 consecutive games from 1995 to 1997. That is some absolutely crazy shit.
Desperation to Inspiration
This dude had .50 cents left in the book and decided to throw up a hail-mary. I have a hard enough time hitting a three-team parlay and this guy did an eight-legger with props to turn his two quarters he found in the couch cushions into over $1500.
Free Play – Spurs -1 vs Pacers
The Spurs are giving just one point to a Pacers team that is coming off a back-to-back and had to fly from Utah to Atlanta and back to Indy over the last three nights. The Spurs have covered in 4 of their last six and were able to rest their starters on Saturday night’s massive win over the Suns.